Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Pageant Mom

Yes, you knew it would be so...Beulah was the smartest in her class at Doggie School. We've been practicing all her commands, like heel, sit, stay, down, and come, for the last week. And all the other dogs were running amock and leaping all over their owners and growling at one another. Beulah kept her eyes on me the whole time, refused to take cheese from anyone but me, and did all her tricks with enormous panache.

I'm thinking of getting her a gig with Seigfried now. We'll travel the world, eat foreign squirrels, amaze distant nations with our style and trundly brownness. Beulah will be picked up by dogs that woof with strange accents, but I will warn her not to taken in...they all just want to climb into her new $100 bolster dog bed that is nicer than mine.

God, I'm such an impulse buyer, it's terrible. I already spent $165 on Tuesday for her shots and the itching to hell and back. Do you think it's okay to call her former owners and discuss her allergies and see if they'll offer to pay half? Is that tacky? I suppose I did offer to take the dog, which means she's my responsibility. But I didn't know she'd need vaccinations immediately, plus a $95 training class. Or that she'd wallow in my bed quite so much, but that's a different story.

Only TWO MORE DAYS till my mini break! Huzzah! A.S. gets here on Friday night, and we're off to Edisto. We ought to just meet there, but his aunt (who is lovely but apparently crazy as a bat) loaded me up with an entire carload of crap to take with us...model ships, travel pillows, mouldery beach towels, crappy plastic framed photographs, etc. I don't have room to put a toothbrush in the Mini, much less Beulah and her mother, Belle, plus the mountain of food I'm taking. I suggested we fling it--"She'll never know!" But A.S. says that in a year, she'll want it back and freak and refuse to speak to us ever again. Plus, she's giving us a piano, so I can't argue with her too much.

4 comments:

Nothing But Bonfires said...

I read this as Pregnant Mom, and I thought "oh great, now she's going to be a knocked-up bride....."

Wordnerd said...

Hmmm...model ships. Cuz you NEED those! Too funny.
Hey -- thanks for the link!

Jemima said...

Holly, if you just jinxed me, I swear to God i will hunt you down and kill you like a dog.

Alexandrialeigh said...

Jem's preggers! Hee!!