Wednesday, March 02, 2005

my conscience has a hyper thyroid

(Blogger just ate this post, and I'm sure this will not be as good as the original)

I had to take a drug test for this new job-- standard procedure, right? And since I don't actually do drugs, and being a complete wino is still legal, why the heck am I feeling so guilty? It's like I'm afraid I caught heroine addiction by standing next to one on the subway.

And when Miss Nobody and I run, we see this man walking his dog and his little girl every morning. This is the cutest little tyke in the world, but I feel like if I grin back at her, her dad's going to think I'm some freak child molester.

When I read about bio-terrorists, pyschotic vigilantes, racism, rampant obesity and child abusers, I don't think, "Whew, thank God that's not me!" I think, "MY GOD, WHAT IF I AM?!"

Now I am right to clench the old butt cheeks whenever I see highway patrol, because those guys have written me about 16 speeding tickets. Don't even ASK what my insurance is. But other than that, why Why WHY am I so guilty all the time?

And why oh why did I just put obesity in there next to child abusers? See, I feel guilty for that too. I'm prejudiced about weight. I am a bad person.

1 comment:

Elysia said...

OK, you are NOT a bad person. Know why? Bad people just do what they do without any consideration for other people. Or worse, they intentionally do it in order to hurt other people.

You, on the other hand, are so aware of everything you say and do and how it might affect other people. You are not a bad person. You are a fearful, but good, person. There's a difference.