Friday, March 11, 2005

Five questions for Jem: From Kelly Love

1. Now that you and AS are once again happy couple, how often do you bring up froggy headed Republican wench?
Actually, I brought her up on our recent vacation. He mentioned something about that crappy ball they went to and I FINALLY got to ask the question I'd been dying to ask: "So was it a date? Before we got back together, was it intended as a date?" And he practically yelled NO! He said he had no desire to ever date her, and her parents called and asked him to escort her. It helps that a friend of mine who was there described her as "extremely rude and very loud." Anyway, I'm still dying to see a picture of the girl he dated in Italy while we were broken up. I've never met her and I absolutely loathe her guts. I try not to envision her as Sophia Loren's voluptuous neice, with him lapping cappacino froth from her cleavage, but sometimes my imagination/masochism runs unfettered. Most days I prefer to think of her as having a moustache. Anyway, I haven't resorted to any snooping... much.

But you know, I always liked the froggy faced Republican, so I guess I'm not really allowed to hate her anymore. We weren't ever close, but she's been nothing but nice to me. So I have purged that little black spot from my soul.

2. When you did your "cleanse," what exactly were you trying to cleanse?
Mostly the urge to smoke and constantly eat processed sugar. I'm skinny, but I get embarassed by how I eat sometimes. Frat boys have better habits. I won't even LIKE something and yet, if it's there, I feel compelled to put it in my mouth (yeah, I know. Lucky A.S.) And the cleanse really did work for smoking. I bet I've smoked three since January 1. It's like you're so miserable and craving everything that you can't pinpoint any one thing that you're truly desperate for. And I'm doing better at eating at least one fruit and vegetable every day.

3. The Nerve: Bumbling Fool or Big Giant Wang?
Don't get me started. I guess bumbling fool. I don't think he intends to be an asshole or anything, but since he doesn't actually DO anything, he doesn't recognize how difficult his poor decision-making affects everyone else. And if he messes with LMN one more time, I'm sending Snoop G after his ass.

4. Do you inhale?
Used to. Did at New Years show, but I'm not really sure what it was I was inhaling. So it probably counts WORSE! Made my friend the Lacto Pescetarian pass out for the entire Wilco set. Awesome.... duuuuuuuuude!

5. What do you plan on naming your first child and would you consider naming her "Kelly Love?"
First child... hmmmm... how bout I just GIVE you my first child for a job at Skirt? ;) No? Well, I will consider Kelly Love, but I actually really like Emmaline for a girl. I like Jemima a lot too--it's actually what my dad wanted to name me, although he would have spelled it Gemina. I bet Mom vetoed it because of what it rhymes with.

Okay, now more for you, Kelly. 1. What's the meanest way you've ever broken up with a boy? 2. What's your favorite book? 3. What is your earliest memory?

1 comment:

Kelly Love said...

The Italian girl does have a mustache! And who will carry on my name? I am on a mission to have SOMEONE name their child Kelly Love. And I will bestow that child with love, affection and gifts...from a distance. Hey, there's a damn good reason I decided not to have any no-necked rug monsters of my own.

In response to YOUR questions:
1) I ended an 8-year, on and off cohabitation by renting an apartment downtown, signing a lease, then taking him there to show him "my new place." With emphasis on "MY". There was a lot more to it, but that was the finale.
2) Oooh, there are SO many...if I had to pick one, it would be Flannery O'Connor's "A Good Man is Hard to Find." My desert island book would be Virginia Woolf's diaries - that one lives on my nightstand and I can open it at any point and read an entry.
3) Earliest memory would be when I was probably around 2 or 3 and my family lived in Newport. It was of being on the beach with our (huge - at least, huge to me) English sheepdog, Taffy. I remember looking at her face and her looking back at me from under her fringe and wishing we could take her to Guam instead of my newborn sister. Taffy had to go to a farm in the country. Katie got to come to Guam with us.